Is Christianity Really Monotheistic

Is Christianity really a monotheistic religion? That is the question that has been swirling around in my mind for quite some time now and not giving me peace. Not my Heart though, my Heart is at peace about my relationship with the Divine in its many forms, manifestations and expressions. It’s just that my mind needs a definitive, cut and dry, black and white definition. It needs a tidy answer and not one with loopholes and variations.

Christ Himself spoke about and to Abba, the Father. He also spoke about the Holy Spirit or the Ruach Elohim or The Spirit/Wind/Breath of God. Jesus, Yeshua also said, “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even after dying.” John 11:25. There are the three, the Trinity. One body, different parts. I get it. I accept it. And, I live it.



Theotokos (God Bearer) / Mother Mary

Having been born into the Ukrainian Greco-Catholic faith/religion, (Ukrainian = national church of the Rus/Ukrainian peoples, Greco-Catholic = orthodox faith originating from Constantinople which is in communion with the bishop of Rome, the pope), and having been a very ardent participant in it for most of my life there are other entities to whom I/we had prayed to. One of them is the Theotokos, Mary, the God Bearer. Yes, I know that technically we don’t “pray to her, but ask her to petition the Son, her Son, our Son, the Son of Man/Woman” just like she did at the wedding of Cana and He listened and responded by turning water into wine.This is an explanation and maybe even a justification for reaching out to her and praying to/through her with the Rejoice*/Hail Mary.

It is very comforting at times reaching out to a feminine version of the Divine. It is as though sometimes in life we need the gentle, loving, and nurturing embrace of a Divine Mother. On earth we came through a masculine and feminine, a mother and father. Both provided a different kind of support and comfort. It is balanced between the male which is analytical and strong with female which is feeling and gentle. Both of these qualities and energies are in each one of us. Thus, why would they also not been the Divine Realm in whose “image and likeness”, Book of Genesis we are made.

Now, I am primarily a practicing Roman Catholic. When I made the switch I felt I was turning my back and being unfaithful and adulterous to my “mother church” and my spiritual mother. But it was she who kept pushing me out of her nest and every time I went back, she made it very uncomfortable and uneasy for me. She said, “Go. Leave. There is nothing for you here. Spread your wings. Grow spiritually. Savor, learn, and nourish yourself with other faiths, traditions, and understandings of the Divine.” I did, even though it broke my Heart and tore it to pieces to do so. But mother knew best. She was right. In hindsight I realize now that I worshipped her and her traditions more than I worshiped the Divine. My religion had become my golden calf. Had she not pushed me out of the nest, I never wold have fallen in love with the Divine. My love affair would have remained with religion, the earthly vessel to the Divine, instead of the Divine Themselves.



In both the catholic and orthodox faiths there are saints. Whatever your quest, query or quiver may be, “there’s a saint for that”. The technical term is “venerating” the saints as opposed to “praying to” the saints. Serious saint followers are ardent around saint relics and objects. It is a sight to behold – much significance and power is projected onto the items. Or maybe, subconsciously it is a practice in raising and attuning the vibration of one’s own energy to that of the saint.

I myself have at times have called upon and called in the Spirit and energy of certain saints. Growing up, Saint  Nicholas was one who was near and dear to me. I sang to him a lot. But I’m not so sure that I listened to him. At that point in my life, it was one way communication with the Divine. I had not learned how to listen yet. Then there was a period in my life when I was in a serious battle, a battle for the essence of my life, and Saint Joan of Arc and I, it felt as though we were One. Her strong, bold, courageous, determined and single minded trust in The Voice and Its message of ‘we can beat the odds and drive out the long-standing invaders’ energy was all around me, within me, and running through me. I do not think any of these saint connections were conscious choices but something that rose up from within me.



In both the Hebrew and Christian texts there are stories and accounts of Angels. We each have been assigned a guardian angel or two. There are rote prayers to angels which we recite either at bedtime or in the morning.

Angel of God, my guardian dear, to whom God’s love commits me here; Watch over me throughout the night, keep me safe within your sight.


Angel of God, my guardian dear, to whom God’s love commits me here. Ever this day be at my side, to light and guard, to rule and guide.

A times I find great comfort in reciting these prayers, either in my Heart or out loud. In my journey of delving into the Divine realm, I learned that just like with saints, there are angels for different needs in our lives, and that there are different levels of Angels. Now, I call upon specific angels for specific assistance.

I’ve also learned how to look out for their signs and methods of communication. They may use numbers, feathers, pennies/change on the street, songs, feelings, dreams, persistent thoughts, coincidences… to get our attention and direct our steps.

Angels are always in our midst. All we need to do is ask for assistance.

Icons & Statutes 

I like having visual aids and reminders in our house of the Divine Realm. I like seeing Them and being surrounded by them. They are reminders to me that I am never alone on either the earthly or the spiritual realms, regardless if a person is next to me or not. They raise my thoughts to the heavenly realm and remind me to “take the higher road” in my thoughts, attitudes, speech and actions. I do not think that I worship the icons and statues, but they do assist me in my worship.

Mother Mary, or The Theotokos, The God Bearer

The Fourth Commandment 

“You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. 5 You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, 6 but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.” Exodus 20 (NIV)

Every religion and every faith and even the way of spirituality has Divine “tools” and customs – even the Shamans. If the Divine is Spirit, then any and all Divine writings, paintings, statutes, traditions, trinkets, amulets, talismans are technically in violation of the Fourth Commandment. The Spirit is always flowing and always in a graceful dance with the Divine leading The Way without the need of any props or objects. Thus, are we all not in violation of the Fourth Commandment? Will we all be summed to the jurisdiction of the Divine Supreme Court of the Fourth Commandment? If God is Spirit then any material representation is a “no-no”.


Divine Hedonist or Divine Expressionist 

And yet, I do it. I bet you do too. Even atheists do it when they attach a certain meaning toward  any object  – even if that object is themselves or their intellect. We use the objects and traditions as a vehicle or a tool for worship, focus, grounding, centeredness.

I know this is taking it to the extreme. I am a purist though. I like to swing with the pendulum to both sides. It is in these extremes that I then can find my “just right” middle of the way.

By turing to all these different God “forms”, am I on course or am I off course? Am I being a Divine hedonist by indulging in all these Divine Expressions? Why don’t I just pray to God? Period. Or, are all these Divine forms nuances of that which is non-explainable, non-shapeable, but rather EXPERIENTIAL. In our life path and journey we encounter variety in everything. In life we need to be both fixed and malleable. Just like in relationships, cooking, painting a wall, or fixing a lawnmower, we need a variety of tools with which to approach the situation and get the job done, with Love.

Perhaps the fourth commandment may be all right with us having Divine “props” for our human nature. Perhaps the fourth commandment is telling us to not let anything that is earthly come in-between our relationship with God, be it work, relationships, hobbies, goals, ideals, religion, spirituality, tradition, and even objects.

Perhaps, at this stage of my journey, I am playing with the notion that Christianity may not be a monotheistic religion. Or maybe I am just not at the stage of my development, where my practice of Divine Worship is monotheistic. The road ahead will tell.

And on that note, let us remember what God said in Genesis 1:26, “Let us make wo/man in our image, after our likeness”.

Abundant Wisdom for All,                                                                                             Irena As I Am                                                                                                      03/12/2018

*Rejoice/Hail NOTE:                                                                                                        The term “hail” was a greeting used by Roman soldiers. The more accurate translation of the Angle Gabriel’s greeting to Mary is “REJOICE”.

And Lead us With The Gifts of the Holy Spirit

I have been on my journey of deepening my intimacy with The Word and becoming more aware of the power of the Word since about 2004 or so – about 13 years now.
God SPOKE and crafted and created Creation with Their Words (Book of Genesis).
It is also written that “life and death are at the end/tip of the tongue”.
The tongue is a very powerful instrument which we are well advised to use it WISELY and for the good/blessing of ourselves and others.
Within this background,
and combined with spending a lot of time in understanding the power of affirmations
and then seeing the evidence with Dr. Masaru Emoto’s water study (see YouTube video),
I found myself
(almost restrained and refrained from deep within)
the last parts of the “Our Father” for a few years now – the part that the pope is talking about in the video below.

Lord's Prayer | ABC News December 8, 2017

Pope Francis wants to change the Lord’s Prayer line “lead us not into temptation” to “do not let us fall into temptation”. He fears the original suggests God can lead people to sin.

Posted by World News Now on Friday, December 8, 2017

The deep feeling that had come into my Heart was “why are you paying homage to what you don’t want – to the seducer and deceiver, to the one who sows doubt and fear, to the lier – and out loud too, with your voice, and with a group. Say instead what is good and Holy and how you do want to live”.
Thus, for the last few years, in this last part, and when in a group, 
I silently replace “that part” and instead ask for the
Gifts of the Holy Spirit:
I’ve also added,
The “I am not worthy” part bothers me a lot too. I just does not sit right, nor feel right. Worthiness and feeling worthy is a lifelong journey of acceptance of ourselves, and we need a lot of help, a lot of GRACE in feeling worthy. Thus, it does not feel right nor good to add with my spoken word and to speak these words over myself and in the presence of others. We all need the opposite affirmation and prayer – feeling worthy of all of God’s Love and Blessings so that we can be a blessing onto others.
What the pope is proposing is good,
but not enough.
This I deeply feel to the marrow of my bones.
I commend him for the courage he has had to even bring up the subject and I pray that The Holy                                                                                                                       Spirit of Truth
Spirit of Love
Spirit of Understanding                                                                                                      Spirit of Wisdom
overshadow him and all the Human Family.
When we change our language,
We change our vibration and reality,
Irena As I Am
They don’t tar, feather, and burn people
at the stake any more.
Do they?
It’s a fear that I’ve had to overcome in the past several years that I’ve been sharing on social media.
At one point I was so afraid of excommunication that I actually went to talk to a priest about it.
I was already pretty sure that I couldn’t be burnt at the stake – but it still did not stop me from looking over my shoulder every time I posted something dogmatically risqué.
It’s a past life thing, and I/we are healing that fear this time around.
I sat on the fence for about six years of the past life notion. It was not until I had my own past life answer sessions which helped me answer questions and understand my own patterns of behavior, that I embraced the concept.
Had I not, I would have stayed stuck. Instead, I received the gift of knowing what I/we needed to resolve and dissolve this time round. Otherwise, I would never have been freed.
In those six years of undecidedness, I read/listened to many books, had countless conversations, and attended numerous seminars in order to acquaint my self with this notion.
The UGCC (Ukrainian Greco-Catholic Church), who is a bi-ritual priest, meaning that he can celebrate both the western Roman Mass and the eastern Divine Liturgy told me he was aware of only one case of excommunication in the UGCC. He said that there had been a group of monks in Western Ukraine who had decided on their own to excommunicate the Bishop of Rome (the pope), and then in his place they themselves amongst themselves voted in and ordained their own “pope”. Thus by virtue of
excommunicating the Roman pope, they had excommunicated themselves too.
Then after some time their new founded “vatican” was not working out so well, so they disbanded it and asked to rejoin the Vatican in Italy. I think (?) this was in the time of pope Benedict, and I don’t think leniency and clemency was in their favor.
This story made me chuckle,
My excommunication fear had not been unfounded, for I had found myself “excommunicated” in another area of my life.
It was because I spoke my truth which I had held inside for a very long time. Had I not spoken my truth, it would have eaten me up from the inside out and just left a hollow shell of a woman and an existence. Yes, it did set me free. Yes it took herculean courage to get it out. It took herculean strength to withstand the back lash. And then it took herculean humility to reconcile. Actuality it took ABUNDANT GRACE & Humility on all parties involved for reconciliation to take place.
(It also helped me that I went on a three day water fast – water only for nutritional intake – to break the spirit of pride and entitlement (to my anger) that had overshadowed me. Around the same time too, I had me a field trip to the ER (not related to the fasting). Sitting there, lying there, all vulnerable and scared, sure put things into perspective: instantaneous clarity.)
It is the Eucharist that had brought me back to the church when I had wondered off and away.
It is the Eucharist that keeps me in the church.
There is nothing more Holy, more powerful, and more grace filled than receiving the Eucharist.

Come to Me

Once upon a time, a long long, LONG, time ago, it was 2:49 am on a southern Sonoran Desert winter’s night. I was snuggled warmly and safely in the arms of a blanket and a bed in a retreat house in a little corner of Holy Trinity Monastery. My sleep was peaceful, deep and restful. And then, The Voice came, hovered in me and awoke me.  Oh, The Voice always comes at the most unexpected times.

“Wake up.”, were the words whispered into and onto me.

I awoke and was immediately at attention.

Then I heard, or rather more like, felt on my Heart these words,

“Come to Me.”

“What!”, was my response and defense and denial.

“Come to Me.”, came back softly, gently, lovingly, and understandingly, for He too had been in flesh once and knows very well its frailty.

“But it’s 2:49 am. It’s the middle of the night. It’s SCARY out there. There are no lights. There are “things” out there in the night, in the wilderness. Unimaginable things that may do unimaginable things to me.”, was my plea and retortion, to no avail.

“Come to Me.” The Voice said, but now it was more insistent.

“Yes.”, I finally acquiesced with my Heart.

The Voice did not have to tell me where The Voice wanted me to go. I just KNEW in my Heart where I was being summoned to. I knew that He was calling me to Him. I knew He wanted me to visit Him at the foot of the “old rugged cross”. I knew He wanted me to spend some time with Him in the middle of the night, in the dark of the night when it was quiet and still. I knew He was testing me. He was testing my faith in Him. He was testing my trust in Him. He was testing my love for Him. He was testing my devotion and commitment to His Way. And, He wanted to prove to me, just how trustworthy He truly was. This, of sorts was an invitation to an initiation. It was an initiation into a way of life of obedience to Him, no matter how I felt, how things looked, or the defense my mind was preparing. It was His High Way or I was going to be on my own and at the mercy of my thoughts and the thoughts and expectations of others. Luckily, Grace stepped in and bolstered me with a heavy dose of Spirit Courage and Humility.

Even though I had a choice, if I wanted peace in my Heart, I knew I had but one choice, and that was to listen and respond. With this in mind, I got out of bed and since I already had pant pajamas on, I put on a warm jacket, shoes, and went out into the dark night. My Heart was beating, my mind was racing with fear thoughts, my belly was squeezed tight, and adrenalin was flooding my body. As I stepped out into the night and walked down the gravel road, I tried to be as silent as I could so as to not draw any attention to myself from whoever or whatever may be peering at me from the dark forest. I kept my head low and my gaze focused forward. I dared not look sideways into the darkness. In my mind and Heart I was not just praying, but begging for strength and courage. And They gave it to me. But the plot thickens, because I also had to walk past a cemetery. Oh yes, They always make a Faith invitation an interesting course.

But with all this inner noise and turmoil going on I did have the presence of mind to notice that the moon had been so large and so bright that I did not need my flashlight. I noticed that I could see very clearly and distinctly. I noticed that from the light of the moon, I cast a shadow on the road ahead of me. My shadow was the scariest thing that I had encountered.

I knew that I had to walk and not run the distance to the cross which was about a city block long.  By forcing my self to walk and not run, I was keeping the fear in check while still being able to keep my presence of mind. Had I ran, I would have let fear overcome me, overshadow me, dictate my behavior and then I would have lost all sense of me. Thus, as I walked past the cemetery and up the hill toward the cross my main goal was just to take the next step, and breathe. Just take the next step, and breathe. Just take the next step, and breathe. I was totally and completely in the moment. Nothing and no-one else existed anywhere, but my breath, my step, and my Heart attuned to Divine Support.

When I got to the cross, on my knees I immediately went, without even thinking. My hands wrapped themselves around the wood and my forehead touched the rocky ground. I was called here to revere the life giving cross. I was called here to take up my cross. I was summoned here to make my bond with the cross. I was going to take cues from the cross in how I was to live, in return, the cross would espouse me and wrap His arms around me and my life. It was our union. It was our reunion.

The cross has remained faithful to me, even though at times I have wavered and hesitated and delayed in my love response to the cross. This is the human condition. This is normal and nothing to be ashamed of nor scorned. But rather, gently accepted for what it is, live with it gracefully, and just do our best in each and every moment.

When I did make it back to my retreat room, and closed and locked the door behind me, I signed a huge sigh of relief. I am human after all: and humans waver. Otherwise we would not need the support of Love. As I snuggled back into the cocoon of the bed, I was in awe and wonder of what had just happened. I savored every moment like lovers savor every glance and  touch. It was also a profound lesson in observing and feeling the fear, but doing it anyway. It showed me to not be at the mercy of my fear, but rather at the mercy and grace of Love.

Little did I know back then, that this was just the beginning of these invitations to trust. There were going to be many more in the years ahead. But the good news is that each invitation to trust was accompanied with the Grace of The Universe at my back. I was not alone. I was not expected to do it alone. I was surrounded by Love. Love imbued me with strength, courage, power, wisdom, gratitude, and profound humility toward The Voice.

Abundant Wisdom, Grace, Courage, & Humility to All,                                                      Irena As I Am,                                                                                                                      In His Service and In His Love

OMg – My Dear Zeus god

Omg – My Dear Zeus-god

Ladies & Gentlemen,
Boys & Girls,
Introducing the likeness and image of the god with whom I grew up with. I now like to call him my formerly beloved, or rather much FEARED zeus-god.

Zeus-god for some unbeknownst reason to me was always ANGRY at me and with me. He was always DISAPPOINTED with me. I could never please him. I could never live up to his expectations of me. He instilled great insecurities and self-doubt. I could never live up to the standards he set. Just by virtue of breathing, I seemed to break some law or another of his – I was inconstant sin, sin, sin mode, thereby gladdening and satiating his ferociously fierce appetite for lightening-bolt punishment.

This caused me to always be looking over my shoulder so that I could gauge  zeus-god’s fickle mood de jour. I was always ready to duck should a lightening bolt come my way as atonement for my being “bad”. And if I managed to duck the lightening bolt because he happened to be preoccupied with bad boys and girls in another village, well then, zeus-god always kept the eternal flames well stoked for my long term “warmth”.

A Herculean Effort
Fortuitously, or rather, an Ocean of Grace intervened and said,
“Let Us show you a different Way.
Let Us show you what and how
Free Will
Peace, and
in and with Us look like and feel like.”

They brought books, teachers, radio/tv evangelists, and friends into my life that showed me how to TRANSFIGURE my fear biased and based zeus-god relationship to one of
I learned how to develop a friendship with Him, with Jesus.
I learned how to make Him, make Jesus, my BEST FRIEND EVER and ALWAYS, my lifelong BFF.

They also showed me how to practice being loving, forgiving, accepting, and merciful with me, no matter what I did or did not do. They showed me that I am always WORTHY of these Gifts, and that it is i who at times can withhold these Gifts from myself. Lastly, They showed me that the more that my Heart grows and is anchored in these Truths, the more I will be able and capable of offering Them to others, to those whom I encounter.
The healing becomes the balm for others.

As our intimacy developed and grew, I realized, and still am realizing, and will continue doing so for the rest of my life, just how wonderful He is and just how wonderful I am.
It’s a day by day and moment by moment journey.

It’s all about Love.
Love is Good, always.
as i was
as i am
as i will be