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iLoved

iLoved, a farewell poem/ballad, a story of my passion: pass i on

  • iLoved you with all of my Heart because I knew no other way
  • iLoved you because God put you in my life every single day

 

  • iLoved you through the ups and downs of life
  • iLoved you because I was a most faithful and dutiful wife*

 

  • iLoved you the best way I knew how
  • iLoved you because it was my Soul’s indelible vow 

 

  • iLoved you even though you took me for granted 
  • iLoved you even though you were always distracted

 

  • iLoved you even though it left me completely depleted 
  • iLoved you even though my Heart was mistreated

 

  • iLoved you because that was what I was supposed to do
  • iLoved you because my life was totally focused on you

 

  • iLoved you because I kept the letter of the law
  • iLoved you because my eyes no one else saw

 

  • iLoved you because I thought with you I was safe
  • iLoved you because life felt like an unsolvable maze

 

  • iLoved you because I could not fathom another 
  • iLoved you because my life and Heart by you were smothered 

 

  • iLoved you because to you I was tethered and tied
  • iLoved you because I had no where else to hide

 

  • iLoved you because you I had feared and revered 
  • iLoved you because the law I had cheered and adhered

 

  • iLoved you because I did not want to disappoint 
  • iLoved you even though it threw me out of joint

 

  • iLoved you because that is how I was programmed
  • iLoved you because that was my entry level of understand 

 

  • iLoved you because my aim was to please
  • iLoved you because this had become my expertise 
  • iLoved you because this had been my off the mark dis•ease

 

  • iLoved you because it was our Soul Contract
  • iLoved you because you were there and I felt trapped

 

  • iLoved you because I wanted you to succeed 
  • iLoved you because my Gift to you was that in you I believed 
  • And sometimes that is all it takes to propel one into high esteem

 

  • iLoved you because you stood up to me
  • iLoved you because you were my solid tree

 

  • iLoved you even though you were never present 
  • iLoved you even though to my Heart this was not apparent 

 

  • iLoved you because I had no other choice
  • iLoved you because suppressed was my voice

 

  • iLoved you because you made me your anti•depressant
  • iLoved you because I truly thought you were omnipresent 

 

  • iLoved you because God asked me to
  • iLoved you and to my Soul’s calling I had to be true 

 

  • iLoved you because I was in the busy•ness of service
  • iLoved you because disobeying made me way too nervous 

 

  • iLoved you even though you never learned how with me to communicate 
  • iLoved you even though I always had to adjust to your gait 

 

  • iLoved you to the point of worship
  • iLoved you with complete obedience and dedication like a temple virgin

 

  • iLoved you because only one of us could be a somebody 
  • iLoved you because your ascent needed steady company 
  • And, my ego was all wrapped up in your worldly haughty 

 

  • iLoved you because you were the apple of my eye
  • iLoved you because in my esteem you were greater than the sky
  • And, I truly thought I would love you until the day I died

 

  • iLoved you because I thought it was normal
  • iLoved you UNTIL I was told it was paranormal 

 

  • iLoved you because I thought love was a one way affair
  • iLoved you UNTIL it drove me to utter. and. complete. Despair.
  • Selah.
  • Selah.
  • Selah.
  • And so, for the sake of my sanity, I checked out. It truly was only fair.

 

  • iLoved you UNTIL my Heart had been all pained out
  • iLoved you UNTIL my Heart was drained without a doubt

 

  • iLoved you UNTIL I was all spent 
  • iLoved you UNTIL my very last emotional cent 

 

  • iLoved you to the point of martyrdom
  • iLoved you even though for my Heart it was a game of zero sum

 

  • iLoved you because you were all I knew
  • iLoved you UNTIL I FINALLY ACCEPTED THE TRUTH that you could never return it in true

 

  • One day, it all changed.
  • One fine day, just like a multitude of other days, I heard the Voice of Love
  • It whispered into my Heart&Spirit that of love it was completely barren of

 

  • It was drained and empty
  • It was depleted and dry
  • It was shriveled and barely beating 

 

  • “Come follow Me, Come follow Me” was the call
  • As Love resurrected me and helped me stand tall
  • Tis was no small feat, I do vividly recall 

 

  • Thus,
  • I gave you all that I had, and more
  • Now however, I must sail into my life and from your shore
  • For the Voice of Love is now what I most adore 

 

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. 

But the greatest of these is 

love

1 Corinthians 13:13

 

  • With Love and in Love,
  • Irena As I Am and Mudryk
  • April 22, 2019 AD, In the Year of Our Love

 

  • *NB: 
  • A wife/husband can be either metaphorical, metaphysical, archetypal, or the actual…it is all in the i/eye of the interpreter and their current state of wholeness journey 
  • Love can be directed and poured into and toward a person, animal, place, thing, notion, emotion, idea, ideal, ideology, country, nationality, religion, spirituality, calling/career, creativity, past, present, future…and even nothingness, void, apathy, vacuum…
  • One can marry a person, OR, any of the above variety of ‘persons’/bodies.                           
  • The above list is not an exhaustive list.